Whose Birthday? #12 - Index

Christmas Presence

by Louis Lotz

Ask people to reflect on their favorite Christmas memory and they never talk about presents. They talk about people. Try it. Ask the person sitting next to you, "Tell me about your all-time best, most satisfying Christmas," and then sit back and listen. See, what did I tell you? They never talk about presents. They talk about people. It's not the gift we cherish, it's the giver. The best Christmas gift you can give to someone is you - your time, your attention, your presence.

When my mother-in-law in Michigan turned 70 they threw a party for her. Among her birthday presents was an enormous, tantalizing box wrapped in bright red paper. It looked like an appliance box. Mom knew right away what it was. "A new dishwasher!" she thought. "Finally, after all these years, my husband took the hint!" Reminding herself to act surprised, she tore off the paper and opened the lid. Out popped her daughter (my wife), who had arrived secretly that morning. Mom was surprised, all right. And delighted. And when her lady friends at church asked her, "Joanne, what presents did you get for your birthday?", what do you think was the first thing she mentioned?

This Christmas, give yourself. Go on a date with your spouse, just the two of you. Take your child to a basketball game. Visit a friend. Take your elderly Dad out for breakfast. A friend of mine who lives in New Jersey called his brother in Seattle and said: "For Christmas, let's do lunch. I'll meet you half way!" They got together at a restaurant at O'Hare Airport in Chicago, had lunch, talked for three wonderful hours, then returned home. The simple gift of yourself - your undivided attention - is the best gift you have to give. What we want most at Christmas is not presents, but presence.

When you read the biblical story of the Three Kings with the throttle of your imagination wide open, you can almost see them traveling across the desert on their silent, plodding camels, following that star up in the sky. Actually, the Bible doesn't say that the Wise Men were three kings, only that there were three gifts. And actually, the Bible doesn't say that the Wise Men were kings, only that they were searching for one. And actually, the Bible does not say that the Wise Men were Wise Men. Matthew calls them Magi astrologers, soothsayers. But other than that, we've got the story straight.

The one fact about the Wise Men that always gets overlooked is that, more than giving gold, incense, and myrrh, they gave themselves. They presented themselves as an act of homage. They "bowed down and worshiped him." The Wise Men didn't send emissaries. They came in person. The gold, incense, and myrrh are incidental details. The thrust of the story is that the Wise Men presented themselves.

When you think about it, that's what Christmas is all about in the first place - God giving the gift of himself. To show his love for the world, God does not send a gift. Rather, God is the gift. "You shall call his name Emmanuel," said the angel to Joseph, "which means 'God with us."' Christmas is all about presence - God with us, and we with each other. I'll take that over a dishwasher any day.

Louis Lotz serves as pastor of Morningside Reformed Church, Sioux City, IA.

A PRICELESS Gift List

The gifts on this list cost almost no money, but they have GREAT value. When we give one of these gifts, we are giving a priceless gift - ourself.

• The gift of listening - One of the greatest things we can do for another person is to listen without interrupting, daydreaming or thinking about our next leap into the conversation.
• The gift of a compliment - Help people reach their full potential - catch them doing something right. Compliment children for listening, for their smile, for giving a hug, for sharing.
• The gift of showing affection - Demonstrate the love we feel deep inside with hugs, kisses, a gentle squeeze of the hand, pats on the back, smiles.
• The gift of laughter - Everyone loves to laugh. Try to see the humor in day-to-day living. Develop the ability to laugh at ourself.
• The gift of cheerfulness - This means no complaining, no feeling sorry for ourself, no nasty comments, no screaming. Our gift of cheerfulness will be precious for everyone including ourselves.
• The gift of doing a favor - Help with the dishes, type a letter, run an errand.
• The gift of a game - Most people have at least one game they like to play... softball, cards, chess, checkers. Offer to play your loved one's favorite game in a non-competitive spirit. Introduce cooperative games. We're winners whenever we share an experience.
• The gift of contact - Write notes as simple as "thinking of you today." Make phone calls if someone is having an especially trying time. Reach out with support.
• The gift of acceptance - Accept with fortitude the things we can't change. This gift makes a difference in the lives of your friends, family, colleagues.
• The gift of prayer - - The hidden gift.

(adapted from "Meeting Ground")

Hymn

GOD, WE AWAIT YOUR ADVENT HERE
Text: Carolyn Winfrey Gillette, 1998
Isaiah 35:1-2; 2 Corinthians 4:6-7
Music: MARYTON LM
by Henry Percy Smith, 1874 - "O Master, Let Me Walk with Thee"

God, we await your advent here:
When will these desert lands rejoice?
When will new blossoms bright appear
And all earth praise you with one voice?

We live in deserts we have made;
Gifts of your love we pass right by.
We seek possessions, more each day,
And then in thirst for joy, we cry.

God, we prepare for Jesus' birth--
Searching for gifts from store to store!
Yet when you sent your Christ to earth,
You gave us joy worth so much more.

When in the love of Christ we grow,
Streams in this desert shall abound.
Then by your Spirit we will know:
True wealth in Jesus Christ is found.

Copyright (c) 1998 Carolyn Winfrey Gillette. All rights reserved. Bruce & Carolyn Gillette, Co-Pastors, First Presbyterian Church, 305 S Broadway, Pitman, NJ 08071(609)-589-8444 E-mail: Bruce_Gillette.parti@ecunet.org.